Tag: memories

family, life

Tiny House Escape: Pender Island

Amanda, walkamyelinmyshoes

We planned to take our tent trailer over to Pender Island for a couple of nights, until we heard the forecast. When we saw it was supposed to pour rain the whole time, the thought of driving an hour west to pick up the trailer then an hour south to get on the ferry, made camping significantly less appealing.

So two days before our trip, I looked on AirBnB and found a tiny house available for rent. Like many people, our daughters are fascinated by the tiny house movement and the minimal lifestyle so it seemed like kismet that it was the only detached accommodation available.

And boy, did we have fun!! Hiking on the nearby trails, getting caught in a cloudburst, playing cards (Cheat – such a hilarious game), watching the random movies left in the tiny (Mermaids – Cher and Winona Ryder= bizarre movie), playing tetherball and just enjoying being together away from regular life.

The bridge between South and North Pender

This sign on Mt Norman cracked me up. I didn’t see at the time that someone had scratched out Steep Trail and wrote ‘falling zombies’. It was very steep, we didn’t get to the top because we were just scoping it out on our morning walk. Next time…

We love going to the playground at the community school to play tetherball. It’s the only ball sport I’ve ever enjoyed – probably because the ball’s attached! It brings back great childhood memories at the same time as creating hilarious new ones with our youngest; we end up laughing so hard we can hardly play.

Not so into tetherball. 😴😴😴

The most incredible thing that happened was that this Prairie-born girl finally saw whales on the ferry! Despite the ferry running late, the captain was kind enough to slow down when he saw the whale watching boats congregating.

After 30 years living here, never seeing whales on the ferry (off the ferry? 🤪), I was skeptical and didn’t spend too long looking. For whatever reason, at the last minute I decided to stand on the edge of the truck so I could see over the edge of the ferry and – oh my! Humpback whales!

So small and insignificant in my little photos, but there is something so magical about the ocean and the creatures that inhabit it. When we are blessed enough to see them, even for a second, it’s an important reminder about the magic and beauty of this world, and our place in it.

So even though we were disappointed to not use the trailer (grateful after the cloudburst!!!), it ended up being a great trip in a completely different way.

Life is funny that way.

❤️ Amanda

chronic illness, life, mental health

Milestones and Reflections

Amanda, walkamyelinmyshoes

At the beginning of June, I celebrated the first year of my blog. It was a huge step for uber-private me last year but the response once I finally faced my fear and hit publish was unreal. I can’t believe I have over 500 followers. More importantly, I can’t believe the support I’ve received and the friends I’ve made in this wonderful community. I’m so grateful. Thank you all. 💕

On this day four years ago, I received my MS diagnosis in the morning before going back to school for the last afternoon with my class. I didn’t know it would be the last afternoon I would spend as a teacher at the time.

It’s been an interesting journey, to say the least. The physical symptoms, especially the fatigue, stopped me teaching but the mental gymnastics associated with being chronically ill really stopped me in my tracks.

Fear, grief, anxiety, depression, guilt. Oh, the guilt! Learning to say ‘I can’t’ – especially to my children, forcing myself to stop when I ‘should’ get a little more done, unable to enjoy the good days because I ‘should’ be working.

I’ve learned to mostly maintain perspective when the anxiety and depression hit because I know it’s temporary, no matter how black. The fear hits pretty strongly when my body does it’s weird party tricks. (numbness, tingling, burning, buzzing, dizziness, tinnitus, spasms, trembling, pain and the fatigue that courses through my veins. #msawareness)

But life is scary for everybody in one way or another. Perspective.

The guilt has been the nastiest of the negatives. It comes up over and over and I’ve struggled to gain the same perspective, especially on the good days. I’d love so much to be back in the classroom that when the uglies lessen a bit, I forget how bad they are and feel I should at least try to go back to work. When they inevitably reappear, I remember why I can’t do the job I love so much.

Four years on, I’m done with the guilt on my good days. I won’t compromise the health I’ve regained since I stopped working by forcing myself to go back to work. And I won’t waste the bonus time I do get feeling guilty anymore, dammit! So there, MS. 🤗 From now on, I’m doing ‘jazz hands’ any time the guilt creeps in – haha!

This day marks a milestone for each of our younger children as well. After knocking our socks off at her Variety Show on Monday singing ‘Defying Gravity’ – (check out my instagram or facebook for the video), our youngest is finishing her last day at elementary school. It’s truly the end of an era, as we started there an unbelievable 15 years ago when our eldest was in kindergarten. Not to mention that my husband and his mother also went to the same school!

Our son is finishing his last day of high school, heading across the country to study Economics at Western University in September. Needless to say, we are incredibly proud of his achievements so far and excited for him, but there will be a big hole in our family that will take getting used to. It’s all as it should be and we can’t wait to see where he goes with his life. This kid is motivated!

Finally, our eldest got her first car so now we have our own taxi 😉 she’s embarking on a whole new level of independence and financial responsibility. We have no doubt she’ll manage her shiny new car with her usual attention and responsibility, and have lots of great adventures in the years to come.

So it’s the end of June and the beginning of summer vacation. The garden’s in great shape, the kids all have exciting plans for the summer, and we have lots of camping planned in our new tent trailer. It’s going to be a great summer!

❤️ Amanda

life

1986: I met my forever Valentine

Amanda, walkamyelinmyshoes

I was sitting in the back room at Marg’s tea house, a converted bungalow where we could hide out and smoke without worry of getting busted by prefects or teachers. Marg, the wizened old lady (she was probably my age now 🤣🤣🤣) would run to the back room and warn us so we could scurry into her basement until the coast was clear.

I was rewriting my French notes, my Walkman playing a Metallica tape, hating boarding school life, school on Saturdays and wearing a uniform. I always hid my short kilt under my giant blue flea market sweater, so only an inch peeked out the bottom. There had been an unusually heavy snow fall for Vancouver Island, so I also had my wooly blue tights on, which turned out to be a stroke of good luck.

I had just lit another Winston (🤢-how did I ever??) when someone walked in. I bit back a growl at having my solitude invaded, privacy was the commodity I missed most, until I saw who it was.

Then, my heart picked up speed at the same time my stomach did a weird somersault. I flashed him a quick smile and looked back down at my notes. What was he doing there? I’d never seen him there before, I’d only seen him a few times around campus. Always with a different girl.

I tried to ignore him but then my tape ended and the Walkman shut off with a loud click. As I fumbled to switch the tape to the other side, he came over to bum a smoke. Next thing I knew, he was sitting at my table and we were talking and joking around like we’d known each other forever.

It all ended with me ‘stealing’ his wallet, and him dumping me in a snow bank. And that was the beginning of everything…

Happy Valentines Day!!! ❤️❤️❤️

❤️ Amanda

Oh so young!