Tag: awareness

chronic illness, healing, mental health, MS

The 7 Phrases That Spike MS Symptoms (And What to Say Instead)

Amanda, walkamyelinmyshoes

Wednesday morning.

 Brain fog so thick I couldn’t remember my daughter’s teacher’s name. 

My first thought: ‘My body is attacking itself.’

My second thought: ‘What if that phrase is making everything worse?’

So I decided to test it.

When I started saying ‘My body’s trying to get my attention’ instead of ‘My body is attacking itself,’ something shifted.

I stopped feeling like I was in a war.

I started getting curious. ‘What is it trying to tell me?’

I noticed a pattern. Every time I spiraled into ‘This is just going to get worse,’ my fatigue would spike within hours. 

Not because the disease got worse, because my nervous system did.

7 Most Common, Least Helpful Phrases, Reframed

1. “I’ll never be the same again” → “I’m becoming someone new”

2. “My body is attacking itself” → “My body needs guidance to heal”

3. “I can’t trust my body anymore” → “My body’s trying to get my attention”

4. “I’m a burden to everyone” → “I’m worthy of support and love”

5. “This is just going to get worse” → “No one knows what the future holds”

6. “I should be able to handle this” → “This is hard, and I’m doing my best”

7. “If I just try harder, I can beat this” → “Healing requires patience, not force”

Why This Matters (More Than I Realized)

I used to think my thoughts were just… thoughts. Turns out, every time I told myself “I’m a burden” or “This is just going to get worse,” my body was listening. And responding.

These phrases flip on the stress response, the same system that would kick in if I were being chased by a bear. Except there’s no bear. Just me, sitting on my couch, flooding my nervous system with panic.

And stress? MS loves stress. It’s like pouring gasoline on inflammation. Within hours of a spiral, I’d feel it. Heavier fatigue, sharper pain, brain fog so thick I’d lose words mid-sentence.

Something finally clicked for me. My body can’t heal when it thinks it’s under attack. 

Healing happens in safety. In calm. When my nervous system can actually exhale.

Why I’m Not Pushing Positivity

I tried the “think positive!” approach. It felt fake. My brain knew I didn’t believe “Everything is amazing!” when I could barely get out of bed. The forced optimism just added another layer of failure.

That’s when I learned about neutral reframing. You’re not pretending everything’s fine, you’re just offering your brain a different pathway. A gentler one.

Every time you choose the reframe over the catastrophe, you’re literally building new neural connections. With repetition, those new pathways get stronger. The old ones fade. Not instantly. But gradually. Like training a muscle.

Want to Try This With Me?

Pick the phrase that shows up most for you, the one that feels automatic, like a reflex.

Write your reframe on a sticky note. I have one on my bathroom mirror, and one on my coffee maker, because apparently I need the reminder before caffeine.

When you catch the old phrase creeping in, pause. Read the reframe. Say it out loud if you can. You don’t have to believe it fully yet. You just have to practice offering it as an option.

That’s it. One phrase. One week. Let’s see what shifts.

❤️ Amanda

MS

How I Stopped Being Mean to Myself (And Why It Healed My Body)

Amanda, walkamyelinmyshoes

I was walking downtown with my family one day, carrying a pretty wooden box I’d found at the thrift store, when my right leg turned into cooked spaghetti and I face-planted on the sidewalk. 

My kids were young, and I guess it looked pretty goofy, or they were embarrassed, because they laughed. So I did too, as I picked myself up, examined the box for damage, and carried on. On the outside, a moment of oops.

In my head, I was Cruella de Vil, ready to skin myself for being so stupid. More concerned about my kids not being scared about their mother wiping out, and the state of the damn box than I was about myself.

That moment, laughing it off while mentally shredding myself, was standard operating procedure. I was really mean to myself. Like the stereotypical mean girl, berating and insulting myself. Like that would snap the MS out of me.

When my body was screaming for a rest, I’d call myself ‘lazy’ and keep pushing through. Then collapse for two weeks.

When I’d drop something, or my leg would pretzel and I’d fall, I’d get angry and call myself ‘stupid’ or ‘useless’.

I finally read something that asked: Would you talk to your best friend that way? Your child? Your pet?

The next time I fell, I tried it. Instead of ‘You stupid idiot,’ I attempted ‘That was graceful.’ Because, you know, humour. It felt ridiculous. Like lying to myself. But I kept trying. And slowly, so slowly, something shifted.

I realized that I deserve the same loving consideration and understanding I give to others. You do too.

Habitual negative thought ➡️ Supportive new thought

  • You’re lazy. ➡️ You deserve to rest.
  • Idiot. ➡️ Careful there, futterbingers. (Butterfingers)                                                                                                          
  • I’m so sick of being sick. ➡️ Healing takes time.
  • I can’t do anything anymore. ➡️ What’s one small thing I can do today?
  • People think I’m faking. ➡️ What other people think is none of my business. 

These are just a few examples. Pay attention to when you’re being hard on yourself, and change any negative criticism to an encouraging positive statement. Your inner critic needs to take a backseat. Preferably in another car going the other direction… or off a cliff. Because here’s what I’ve learned…

When I stopped punishing my adult self and spoke to my 5 year old self instead, my body started feeling safe enough to heal. The alarming symptoms she was sending to get my attention lessened the nicer I was to myself.

That scared, hurting little girl didn’t need a drill sergeant. She needed someone to tell her she was doing her best. That she was brave. That she deserved rest and kindness and patience.

She still does. So do you.

That pretty box? I keep it beside my bed to hold my daily gratitude post-it notes. It’s a little banged up but still functional and beautiful. Sort of like me.

Healing is not a straight line, it’s more like bumper cars. You’ll crash, back up, crash again, but you’re still moving forward. Day by day, with patience and consistency, it adds up and you will see progress.

What’s the nasty thing you catch yourself saying? What’s a simple reframe? Let me know in the comments.

❤️ Amanda

Want more simple, free healing tips? Join my weekly email list for short, practical emails – no spam, and no eyeball swirling GIFs included. You’ll receive my free MS Mindset Reset Guide, and join a like-minded, supportive community of women determined to go beyond managing symptoms and begin true healing. Click the button and join us today!
Get Your free MS mindset reset Guide
Be kind to yourself

chronic illness, healing, MS

Finding Hope in MS: 2 Healing Tips

Amanda, walkamyelinmyshoes

Remember that feeling when you first heard ‘MS’? Like someone just handed you a puzzle with no picture, half the pieces missing and said ‘good luck!’

The overwhelm is real. Medication, or not? Can I still work? How do I tell people? Will I end up in a wheelchair? And on and on. The carousel of terror you never signed up for.

 My 23 year diagnostic odyssey ended with a neurologist saying, “Based on your MRI and history, you have MS. Take these (handing me a 10 pound stack of pharmaceutical information) and pick one.” That was the first time I understood the impulse to throat punch someone.

Here’s what I wish someone had whispered in my ear during those early, scary days. “MS isn’t the end of your story, and it’s not your identity.”

Here are 2 simple things that brought me back from the edge. Healing isn’t easy, but it is simple.

2 Game-Changing Tips

Tip #1: Why I Talk to Trees Now

In the early days, when it was hard to even get out of bed, the thought of going outside was as appealing as a quick hike up Mount Everest.

Eventually I dragged my butt out the back door and sat in a chair, staring at the garden. It felt like punishment. At first.

Watching the birds fly overhead, the leaves dance in the breeze and the flowers slowly open their faces to the sun, woke something up in me. Something that became a major ingredient in my healing journey.

The more time I spent outside, the better I felt. Something about just being there started restoring my energy.

Barefoot in the grass or on a beach, sitting under trees. On cold, rainy days, even staring at houseplants.

Sometimes sitting in my car at the beach or a park with the window open.

When all else failed, on ‘bed days’, I’d search “nature meditation“ on YouTube. Tim Janis is a great channel and doesn’t get interrupted by ads.

Trees don’t judge if you cry at them. Trust me, I’ve tested this. Those tree huggers are on to something. I wrap my arms around a tree and whisper my thoughts. Call me crazy, but the tree whispers back. And my nervous system downshifts and relaxes.

Actionable step: Aim for 5 minutes outside daily.

First thing in the morning is best and will improve your sleep. More time is obviously better, but doing it daily is the most important.

Start small so you can achieve it every single day. That’s how you make progress.

Tip #2: The Vertigo Solution I Didn’t Believe Would Work

Stress is the mortal enemy of MS. Living with MS is very stressful. It’s a vicious cycle.

MS stress amplifies everything. Things that wouldn’t have bothered you before, pluck those stress strings and have you vibrating (literally) with unwelcome negative energy.

How do you take back control? You pay attention to a process your body does automatically, adjust it and use it to your advantage.

In my last post, I talked about baby belly breathing. You’re born with the ability to breathe deeply and oxygenate your body properly. As you grow and get exposed to the inevitable stress of being human, you lose that ability.

Early on, I struggled a lot with vertigo and light-headedness. It’s like living in a fun house, minus the fun. When I learned to breathe properly and added specific breathing techniques, the vertigo loosened its hold over time and I stepped out of the fun house.

Actionable step: 4-7-8 breathing

  • One hand on your belly
  • Inhale through your nose for 4 counts, feel your belly expand
  • Hold for 7 counts
  • Exhale through your nose for 8 counts
  • Repeat for 3-5 rounds

Healing is possible

This is just the beginning of your journey. I know you want to feel better right now. Find that well of patience inside, practice consistently and be kind and compassionate with yourself. I promise you will start to see results.

Last week, I was hugging a tree in the park, releasing some difficult emotions. A woman walked by and winked at me. I walked past her a few minutes later, now she was hugging a tree with a huge smile on her face. What once felt a bit silly, now feels like wisdom.

What’s one small thing you’ll try this week? Let me know in the comments.

You’re not alone.

❤️ Amanda

Want more simple, free healing tips? Join my weekly email list for short, practical emails – no spam, and no eyeball swirling GIFs included. You’ll receive my free MS Mindset Reset Guide, and join a like-minded, supportive community of women determined to go beyond managing symptoms and begin true healing. Click the button and join us today!
Get Your free MS mindset reset Guide

life, mental health

Learning to Be

Amanda, walkamyelinmyshoes

The world has stopped. The unthinkable has happened and we’re in crisis mode, trying to get our heads around this ‘new normal’.

I’ve been here before.

No, not exactly like this, obviously. But almost five years ago, my world stopped when I finally admitted I couldn’t teach anymore. I’ve been adapting to my new normal ever since. It’s been a bumpy ride, but there have been many surprising blessings as well.

Learning to be. This is a big one. We are so inundated with messages telling us we need to be doing something all the time. There’s a culture of busy-ness, where the more you’re doing is like a badge of honour. When you have a chronic illness, that’s not really an option because the fatigue, among other things, is so killer that You. Just. Can’t.

So you spend a lot of time at home, sitting around, isolated, without a whole lot of options for entertainment. Sound familiar? I’m sure it’s a new experience for most healthy people, and it can be uncomfortable just sitting in your own skin sometimes. Or maybe that’s just the MS. 🤔

But just being, instead of always doing can be a wonderful opportunity to get real with yourself and figure out what’s really important. We’ve been conditioned to believe we need to be working, be productive, be entertained, be adventurous, be travelling , be consuming, be socializing.

We’ve forgotten that sometimes it’s important to just BE.

When you stop doing and sit quietly with yourself, your mind has space to process. This is why meditation has become so popular. But you don’t even have to be that organized about it. I’m not knocking meditation in any way, I’m just suggesting that you pay attention to whether you take any time during your day to stop doing and just BE.

Staring at nature is my go-to for times when I need to stop and be for awhile, even if it’s just out the window, or the nature channel on TV. I guess that’s technically doing something but the mental health benefits outweigh any slicing of that proverbial hair.

We’ve been running on the societal treadmill for so long that doing nothing, just BEING is a difficult thing for many people right now. I get it. Like with anything though, a shift in perspective can change this strange situation we’re finding ourselves in, into an opportunity to examine our values and decide if we really want to go back to the “old normal”.

As much as I miss teaching, I am grateful every single day for my many blessings. Learning to be comfortable with just being and not doing all the time has helped me enormously in accepting my new normal. I hope it helps you too.

Just be.

Hummingbird in flight feeding
Look what you can see when you stop doing for a few minutes. Just be.
Photo credit: Amanda L. Callin

❤️ Amanda

Health, life, mental health

Love. Not Fear.

Amanda, walkamyelinmyshoes

View at Medium.com

It has been far too long since I’ve published anything but this article is important enough to share. If you allow your fear to spiral out of control, that lowers your immunity and makes you more susceptible to getting sick.

Stay informed, but focus on connection and gratitude. Turn off the screens and get outside. Wash your hands, and stay home unless it’s essential to go out. Stay safe and healthy out there!

❤️ Amanda